The father of my five children transferred money to me by mistake. He never paid child support.
I didn’t expect it. No one expects it. It’s like when you think the baby is sleeping and then suddenly… a diaper bomb. Here’s what happened. I was at the supermarket, checking if I had enough money for a kilo of meat or if we’d go back to using Disney-style magic lentils, when my phone vibrated. And it wasn’t a message from one of those toxic mom groups at school, no. It was a notification from the bank.
Transfer received: $150,000
I had to blink twice. Then three times. I was about to cross myself, and I’m not even religious, but seeing his name there… “Miguel Fernández transferred you $150,000.” I thought it was a scam.
“It’s not possible,” I muttered to myself.
The woman next to me, holding a tray of chicken, looked at me as if I’d just discovered the secret of the universe.
“Are you okay, honey?”
“I don’t know. I think the father of my five children just wired me some money.”
The woman’s eyes widened.
“Did he get back together with you?”
“No. If he did, I’d become a nun. I think it was a mistake. Because he… he’s never given me even half a box of spaghetti in his life. Plus, he once offered to take the kids to his mother’s house… and when I got there, she wasn’t there.”
“What a treasure!”
“A rough emerald,” I said with one of those smiles that hide trauma.
I drove home in detective mode. I checked the account information, the date, the bank. It was him. My ex. The father of my children. The Houdini of child support. The ninja of responsibility. And he had wired me $150,000.
I couldn’t resist. I sent him a voicemail.
“Hi, Miguel.” Sorry to bother you with your busy schedule and disappearances, but I just received a wire transfer from you. Is everything okay? Did someone die? Did you have an accident? Did your computer get hacked? Tell me if I should return them or if you finally had a revelation and decided to keep your five children.
Exactly seven minutes have passed.
New voicemail: Miguel
I took a deep breath. I pressed play.
“Um… Hi… Clara… Yes, listen… it was a mistake. The wire transfer was for another Clara, the new… well, my… current partner, you know. Please, can you return them? I didn’t realize.”
I had to pause for a moment. Another Clara? Really? It wasn’t enough for her to leave me with five children, but she also found someone with the same name as me? I don’t know if it was the irony of fate or just his usual level of creativity.
I replied:
